Anger management

  

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We all get angry at many things. It is normal. But, engaging in a quarrel or disrespecting others due to your hot temperament is no good. You become unpopular among people and branded as a quarrelsome, obstinate and uptight person which is not good in the long term. People become hesitant to deal with you and ultimately, you are isolated. There is no doubt that your competitive party will further inflate the rumours and make you untouchable. You will feel why people are so distant these days. In schools, colleges, or offices, it happens all the time. It is a dog-eat-dog world. We have competitors who are willing to displace us or replace us at any moment. If you constantly show such a hot temperament, it becomes a good opportunity for them.

In my school days, I came to know this. We engaged in silly fights or debates all the time. After such conflicts, you generally do not feel good. If the conflict is big and is unsolved for many days, the uncomfortable feeling stays for many days. Moreover, you just keep explaining the whole thing again and again before people. It just enhances the pain and suffering. People just need spicy talks and nothing else. So, I learned an important lesson to manage anger and not to engage in unnecessary conflicts.

There are some techniques which can be used in such sticky situations when you encounter an aggressive person. You have to be very patient not to give any ammunition to the other person’s canon. You keep calm and listen to what the other person is saying. You give a professional answer as per the situation and take a deep breath. Deep breathing helps to calm the mind.  After the encounter, you try to divert your attention to some other work and do not keep repeating things before an audience.  Generally, people take your words and add spice to further feed a larger audience. On your part, you should play it as a small affair and let the issue roll on its own. You are to protect your image. If you maintain a calm and quiet demeanour, the other person will be automatically looked upon as an aggressor.

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Two people, two lessons regarding interviews

 

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I keep in touch with my friends and former students. Whenever we meet, we talk about recruitment trends and share various insights. In this post, I will talk about two important lessons from two different people.

One fine day, one of my friends informed me that he was going to appear in an interview at a college. The college is not far away from where I am staying currently. It was an administrative post. After the interview, we met and had a cup of tea. I asked him about the interview questions. He kept on talking about the questions and answers which he gave. Then, he told me that they were asking about the college campus and its various infrastructures. He had nothing to answer because he did not think of those types of questions. In the case of administrative roles, generally, people ask such questions. Probably, one looks for alertness and keen intent to work for the organization. I have seen these types of questions asked in engineering personal interviews also. So, the right way to address such a situation is to prepare a small note about the organization and its rich history. Besides, one should also know about its various departments, ancillaries, offshoots etc. A good grip on various grants or projects which the organization is receiving from the government in case of a government entity or doing on behalf of the government is a must. Eventually, he did not get the job. That day, I had somehow guessed it because I saw many people failing in that part before him and also in that organization. He learned the lesson the hard way. Therefore, a background check about the visiting entity is a must in case of interviews.

The second story is related to a student from my institution. The student was an average one. As per teachers, she could not express herself in the lab viva voce. However, she did exceptionally well in a tough job interview in her core sector. It was a surprise to everyone. Then, every student who gets recruited gives feedback. In that feedback session, she was asked about her transition. She said that she watched YouTube videos of mock interviews such as UPSC, banking etc. She learned how to handle interview sessions through such videos. She practiced herself many times considering different situations. Now, here she used an important concept taught in “Brain Rules” book; if you put yourself in an exam-like situation before an exam, you become confident and do well. She put herself adequately in different interview scenarios and was ready for the occasion. When the opportunity came, it was an easy pick. So, one can rehearse theater artists to perform before the audience. Therefore, if you keep on preparing that way, you are destined to perform well.

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Expectation & over expectation

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 For many years, I have observed that students expect to have a high salary right after college. If they do not get a good package, they become disheartened. Many students even do not join their campus placements. Those misdirected souls loiter around and waste precious time.  However, some students do get a high salary but the number is very small. The majority of the students are going to get the average package or lower than the average package. This is the reality and it should be accepted with humility. You get what you deserve. Someone may have given more time to learning things and hence he or she has been rewarded. If you work hard from now on, you will also climb the ladder. You have 30 to 35 years ahead of you to do something and excel in it. If your effort is continuous, no one can defeat you. Life is a long journey; it should be looked at in that way. Nothing happens overnight as the saying goes, “Rome was not built in a day.”

 

In popular culture, a fresher’s salary is mocked and made fun of people hesitate to join certain companies and these companies are the biggest recruiters in India. In popular stand-up comedies, people are made fun of their organization and their salary. Now, you need to understand that a fresher is someone who is starting and learning things. So, nobody will pay someone who is learning and not productive to the company currently but he or she would be an assent after the training. An asset is something that gives back a return on investment. The companies invest a lot in training the recruits because work demands are different in companies. One more thing that should be remembered is that the companies are capitalist and they do business to earn and not to give jobs. 

 

Probably, no college in the world can make you fully job-ready. It is simply not possible even for premier institutes. You should understand that the college prepares you with basics and builds your confidence. If you are a mechanical engineering student, after studying mechanical engineering, you cannot make iron suits like Iron Man, can you? Since you are not that kind of Superman; you should not have a super expectation. So, one needs to step down from heaven and work like a mortals. Generally, the high achievers gauge the gap between college curriculum and industry requirements through their efforts. If you observe them, they know something you do not know.

 

 Once you go to work, you will find some of your basics put into use and the rest of the things, you will learn by training and experience. Therefore, keeping aside all the negative thoughts, one should reconsider and devote some time to learning. If you go to markets in many parts of India, vendors let you try the item before you purchase so to build confidence. Similarly, one needs the first few years in the job as the letting others try period. You should not think of salary to a large extent. After some experience, you can switch jobs for a salary hike.  

 

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Reality of jobs

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The jobs are meant for earning a living. You study and try to land a job in your field. Many a time, it does not happen because there is simply no demand.

Understanding the job market is very important. Mostly businesses run in cycles. They have good times and bad times. If you study a stream which has already in good demand in the market, it may slow down by the time you are out. Students flood the market and it is saturated. This is simple supply and demand. Then, there is a concept of passion for a subject or field. A proper passion follower puts his whole heart into it. For such a highly self-motivated person, following a subject or field passionately is not difficult and thereafter landing a job is far easier compared to common folks. For example, you like writing articles. You write for Wikipedia without payment for years for your passion. Many would discontinue right here. But, you kept on going and the Wikipedia gave you a grant for your enormous contribution.

Commonly, people are just pretenders who claim to follow passion. So, they are neither this side nor that side. Becoming a passionate follower is very difficult. On the other hand, you have not put that much effort. So, keeping a fixed mindset about landing a job of your liking should be put aside. In such a situation, one can be flexible and pick what is in the way rather than getting starved to death! For many, it may be difficult to chew but the sooner one understands, the better would be for him. Time and tide waits for none.

In the olden days, people did not have many avenues to work. They worked hard in fields and pursued their hobbies in their leisure time. If you are not satisfied with your job and it is paying your bills, then you need to keep working. To amuse yourself, you can resort to your hobbies. While writing this article, I am wondering “Is my writing paying my bills?” No, it is not. It is just a hobby. I write for fun.

If you like the post you can read or gift the author's books  "B.Tech Guide Book" & "Campus Placement Guidebook" available worldwide in Amazon in Kindle format.

 

 

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No one is thinking about you

 

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In our lives, we feel that everybody is watching us and talking about us behind our backs all the time. It happens to some extent and that is it. This is a normal practice. Everybody does this and so we need to accept it anyway. Many a time, people overthink about it and cut themselves off from everyone. Even though people talk, it is not like they have been talking and thinking about you all the time. We need to keep in mind that everyone has something to do. People gossip a bit and forget it. We have to accept it because it is normal human behavior. Even if, you are being taught to not indulge in gossip, everyone does it knowingly and unknowingly. When you do it, others will also do it. It is a free world. On the other hand, there is a positive side to it. Because of fear of such talks, people think twice before doing something. So, it compels a person to make a rational decision in any situation thinking about others. Generally, such gossip dies down after a few days because people move on to the next big thing! Suddenly, your news becomes stale. Ignoring gossip does help. It is not in your control. So, why do you need to worry?

 

If you like the post you can read  or gift author's books  "B.Tech Guide Book" & "Campus Placement Guidebook" available worldwide in amazon in Kindle format.

 

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